Poetry by Me
by believable-pen
Summary: A collection of Poetry and Songs by me...


In Dreams

When I dream, I dream of you

Even though you are not here with me

My mind is filled with visions of you

Even though you are not close to me

I see you so clearly in my dreams

That I can't believe your gone

You seem so real in my dreams

Now I don't want to carry on

Living without you isn't living at all

It's just moving from day to day

Living without you is painful, and yet

I wouldn't have it any other way

I lost you once, I won't lose you again

Even though this pain is so hard to take

But I just grin and bare it

For a stronger man of me it will make

If I see you in my dreams

At least I have you with me

If I only have you in dreams

Then that's the best of you in me

I will mourn you my whole life

Have you here in my heart

I will hold you close to me

Then we'll never be apart

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For The Love Of Jack

You don't have to say you love me

Because I know deep down you care

You don't have to say a word

Because I know you will always be there

You are like a second skin to me

That fits me like a glove

Surrounding me with all I need

Protection, comfort and love

I look into your eyes so blue

And see love reflected there

Saying what mere words never could

Letting me know that you care

Never stray too far from me

Because without you there's no air

You make it hard for me to breathe

With this love that we both share

When the sun goes down and we're alone

You prove just how much you care

Kissing me so passionately

Running your fingers through my hair

I know sometimes you have to leave

And that's alright with me

But you tell me when I need you

This is where you want to be

So promise me when I'm no longer here

That you won't grieve alone

A man like you should always love

And should never be on their own

But I hope that's an age from now

And we can share each day

Wrapped in your loving arms

It's where I want to stay

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God, Help Me

The sun is shining on a brand new day

The sky is so cloudless and blue

I can feel the sun's warmth from so far away

But I feel nothing without you

It's on days like these I wish you were with me

But I know that's impossible

For you are no longer on this earth

I can no longer stand next to me

But life must go on for the living

And I try my hardest to get through

But I know it's just a mask I wear

For I'll never get over you

You were the one I'd been searching for

And at last I thought my life was complete

I would have done anything for you

Would have laid the earth at your feet

But God had other plans for us

And being together for life wasn't one

So I must live on for us both

Feeling suffocated under this sun

Maybe one day I might find another

But love will never be quite the same

Life must go on for the living

So why do I whisper your name?

God, help me get through one more day

Without the one I love by my side

Help me to come to terms with my loss

And help me with all the sadness inside

Help me to walk in the sunlight

Not wish it were stormy and full of gloom

Make my life somehow better

Bring the brightness back to my darkened room

Give back life to this heart of mine

Make me see that life is still worth living

That tomorrow and the next day will be fine

That love is really worth having

I think about our lives every day

And wonder what we would have been doing

If God had not taken you away

And suddenly I can't feel a thing

Your death has left me feeling numb

My heart can't feel a thing

But still I walk out in the sun

And wait for my new life to begin

I never want your memory to die

Or your name to be lost on my lips

For we'll be eternal lovers, you and I

Sailing on clouds for ships

I look to the heavens and I smile

My loss is the angels delight

Though you were only with me for a while

I can see you in the angels light

Be with me in my dreams at night

And kiss my tears away

Show me that tomorrow can be bright

For it will lead to a brand new day

I have found peace in my dreaming

But still your loss I can feel

Maybe life is really worth living

And this dream will one day be real

For one day I will die and join you

And together once again we'll be

We will be heavenly lovers, we two

And the angels will be happy for you and me

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Captain Jack

I'd walk into hell to follow you

I'd give up my life if you asked me to

My life has changed since the day we met

To work with you at Torchwood I have no regret

My heart beats faster when you are near

My feelings for you sing out loud and clear

Do you feel the same for me, will the ending ring true

Will I capture your heart, will I end up with you

He is my hero, on him I depend

I hope that he declares his love in the end

But I can wait as long as it takes

Until a soul mate of me he makes

His lips on mine I dream about

His love and tenderness I can't live without

Do I dream these dreams in vain

Will wanting him so much end in pain

The suns in your smile, the stars in your eyes

Your kiss leaves me breathless, your touch tells no lies

I would wait forever for those words to be said

Walk into hell for my soul to be fed

To hear those words, to hear I love you

To come from your lips and to know they are true

But til then I sit and hope that some day

You look at me in that special way

I hope this isn't where my dreams all end

My heart in a box to him I'd send

If only he would declare his love for me

For eternally happy I would be

Will Ianto get what Ianto dreams of

Will Captain Jack confess his love

Only time will tell how this story ends

But on Captain Jack my happiness depends

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The One

I loved you from the first day

Though I knew it could never be

You could never love someone

Another man like me

So I kept it all deep inside

Never to let you know

Just watching you from afar

Wondering how far I should go

Do I tell you how I feel?

And face rejection there?

Do I just keep my mouth shut?

Or would you really care?

It's been two months since Lisa

It's left you vulnerable and weak

Do I now tell you how I feel?

Is it now my time to speak?

But I'll go on believing

That there is a chance for me

To get inside your heart

To a place where I'll be free

Free to show you how I feel

To hold you, love you, care

I will never let you go

If you'll just let me in there

I must keep my hopes alive

And pray one day you'll see

That no on else can love you

Half as much as me

You are the one I dream of

The one my heart will only love

You are the only one for me

I've been searching for you all my life

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My Love

You've been with me through the years

To guide me and to love me

Through happy times and tears

I hold no one else above me

My life, to you, I dedicate

To you my whole life through

To be you're lifelong mate

I give my love to you

Never stray far from me

For my eyes hold you so dear

For I will always love thee

Say the words I love to hear

We pledged our love together

That happy day in December

We will live happily together

Have happy times to remember

For, you are my anchor

That ties me to your side

Say you will be here forever

My love, my soul mate, life's guide

I could go on forever

Pledging my love to you

For you know I'll leave you never

For this love of ours is so true

In years to come time will show

What we now have was meant to be

A gift from up above

You're a precious gift to me

So, sit and share this moment

Of just you and me

Our loves is heaven sent

And was always mean to be

Give thanks to Him up above

For giving us this time

Everyday I confess my love

And thank God that you are mine

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My Prayer

I have waited for a long time

For someone to enter my life

To take me in their arms

To end my torment and strife

I wanted you to be the one

To brighten up my days

To fill my nights with loving

To change my life in so many ways

I have watched you from afar

My heart full of love for you

Take me in your loving arms

So that one can become two

Answer my prayer I beg you

Make the sun shine again

Make me a happy person

And send away my pain

I would give my life's blood

Just for a moment in your arms

So, make my prayer come true

And make this stormy sea calm

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In Hours

In the hours that I think of you

I know deep down your love it true

I'll love you til the day I die

And you don't understand the reasons why

My love is like a tidal wave

Makes me a coward, makes me brave

For you love I would change my ways

And love you for the rest of my days

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You

My heart is spilling over

With love so deep and true

My eyes will never wonder

For they see only you

My arms were meant to hold you

And these lips to kiss yours alone

My soul is yours forever

You make my heart you own

Never stray far from me

And love me til you die

I will cherish you forever

I will hold your love on high

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Zanto, Zanto

Zanto, Zanto sing me a songGrant me a wishDon't make me wait longZanto, Zanto grant me my dreamMake him so handsomeMake him part of my teamZanto, Zanto you are a starI will follow youWe will go farYou can make wishes come trueOne wish for meAnd lots more for you

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Em

Em you are a lovely lassYour bright your clever you shineEm you light the darkest room

Your voice is so divineAs cosplay your the bestYour Ianto Jones is spot onDon't give others any restCos you are Ianto aloneKeep it up at Hub 5And I'll see you thereI might dress as JackWe'll make a spiffin' pair

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Goodnight

Time to say goodbyeStow away the laptopAnd maybe get some shut eyeOr maybe watch some tvAnd settle on the bedWatch some CSI New YorkLet stories go round in my headI'll be refreshed tomorrowAnd stories anew will appearBut til then dear friendsI'll keep you all right here

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**Ode to John Barrowman**

**John is there to entertain us**

**Whether on stage or screen**

**He's handsome, witty and incorrigible**

**With the bluest eyes I've ever seen**

**He makes our hearts pound with joy**

**His Johnettes we will be**

**He's a hero for every girl and boy**

**The proof is right here in me**

**Such a perfect face**

**With a perfect smile**

**Such a lovely man**

**Such a lovely style**

**May you go on forever**

**Singing and acting too**

**You fill our lives with so much joy**

**We love you very much, too**

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Ode to Gareth..

My life has changed because of you I had no friends now I've quite a few My nights were empty My days were blue Now all that's changed Because of you They say life begins at 40 Yes but not for me My life began at 57 And now I am set free I feel like 17 again I know this much is true My life is so much better And it's all because of you The days are so inviting Where once they were so blue My nights are spent in writing And it's all because of you So take a bow you're an angel You deserve it, too Yes, I am what I am today And it's all because of you

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Now I want To Live

My life is now filled with contentment

But it wasn't always this way

I was plagued with confusion and self doubt

And the tape in my head wouldn't play

My sleep was disturbed, my life was a mess

I didn't know which way to turn

But somehow with help I made it through

Any my old life I just want to burn

No master plan could then make me feel

Like my life was worth living at all

People dismissed me, scorned and dist me

I was always waiting for the fall

Some days it felt like my life was too hard

And an easy way out was the best way

But now friends love me and like me

And I live to write another day

I'd like to thanks all my new friends

For helping me through the bad times

To say how much I love you all

I'll write you all poems in rhyme

To Ianto's, to Jack's, to Robyn, to Pat

To Marion, to Jimmy and Ruth

And to all those that I missed out

To you I'll tell only the truth

I know that I'm much older

Than those of you I chat to

But older is wiser and experienced

I can be a true friend to you

Authors Note:

Thanks guys, I love you all xxxx

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Left Alone [The Storm]

After the storm last night

Everything was different

You were no longer my guiding light

And I was left alone

No one to hold me when I cried

Or to tell me they loved me

No one to raise me on high

For I was left alone

My mind drifted back to when you were here

Holding me all through the night

No more whispering in my ear

For I was left alone

Alone to fend for myself

Alone to face an unpredictable world

Alone without a love to keep me safe

Yes I was left alone

You said you loved me

So why did you go away?

The storm took you from me

And I was left alone

I will find another love

Someone to hold me and love me

I will find what I'm looking for

And then I won't be alone

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Underground [Making Sound]

From underground the noises come

And my life will never be the same

Like echoes from a far away drum

It started out a mournful hum

Beating fast, then beating slow

I want to follow, where I don't know

Each beat is getting closer now

And my head is pounding with every sound

Calling me out into the night

My mind is weak, so I can't fight

On bended knees I follow the beat

It moves away, now in retreat

Help me know I cannot fight

Help me out into the night

Give me back my life my soul

Make this empty man whole

But I am forever under it's spell

Can't break the magic, can't you tell

I'm captured by the mournful sound

Like horses running underground

No will to give up, or to lay down

No way to get out, just this sound

Forever now I'm in it's grip

My life's not my own, my heart is ripped

From underground the noises came

Each heartbeat calling out my name

I try to fight I have no will

The wind has gone the night is still

Help me know I cannot fight

Help me out into the night

Give me back my life my soul

Make this empty man whole

Echoes of days long gone past

Maybe this heartbeat will be my last

Just mournful voices in my ear

From underground, they reach me here

I can't give up, I just give in

Blurred vision, my heads in a spin

Falling, falling, underground

Towards that beating, mournful sound

Look away don't let them see

Or you will just end up like me

Now my life is not my own

The drumming sound is not alone

Recruiting souls one by one

Until the setting of the sun

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Walls and Chains

These four walls will never hold me I'm much stronger than you think These chains will never bind me They don't keep me bound to you I'll break free, just you watch me Show you just what I'm made of I'll show my true colours, you'll see I won't let you trap me with false love Just you let go of my hand Please let me walk on my own Don't try and force me to stay Just cos you can't make it alone Watch me as I walk out that door Not looking back as I leave You never thought I'd do it You never thought I'd believe I know my strengths, my weaknesses And I know what is not real You never truly loved me You wouldn't know how I feel You will find another love To bind them with your chains To build your walls around them Yes you'll know love again But never will I fall so fast Next time I'll seek true love And they will treat me better No walls, no chains, just love

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No Life

I wonder through this house in vain

Trying to find out who is shouting my name

I search and search high and low

But never find anyone I know

You walked out on me last week

Said you were sick of living with a freak

That I would never measure up to

Whatever you were now used to

I'm half the man I was since you left

No heart, no soul, just an inch off death

I can't seem to concentrate

My mind just won't negotiate

It's no life without you by my side

Blow out all the candles I want to hide

Hide away with this hurt and pain

Away from prying eyes I'll go insane

I want you back beside me it's true

For I never loved anyone else but you

You treat me bad, you treat me mean

You told me it was to keep me keen

Now I am alone and you are gone

I don't think I want to carry on

I might as well just lay down and die

Just fade away, drift into the sky

Until you are back again with me

This is the way I want it to be

I'm tired and alone, I'm grieving

I'm restless and abandoned, I'm seething

Make me whole, make me alive

Come back and be part of my life

Don't stay away, don't make me blue

All I want out of life is you


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